TITLE: Stargazing
AUTHOR: Kathleen Anderson
SPOILERS: none really, just general knowledge of the show
SEASON/SEQUEL: Season 4/5 - no sequel
SUMMARY: Just a little sappy piece about stargazing
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: S/J Archive and Heliopolis. Anyone else want it? Mail me!
FEEDBACK: Of course!
DISCLAIMER:Nothing except the plot is my own. Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. No money is being made from this.


"Up here!"

Sam looked up and saw Jack waving at her from the roof of his house. He was no doubt doing some stargazing. It had, at first, surprised Sam to learn that Jack had an interest in astronomy, but then, Jack O'Neill was a man of many surprises.

Sam found the ladder and climbed up to join Jack who was looking through his telescope.

"Ever wonder how many of those stars out there have planets that we've been to?"

Sam shook her head, "Can't say that the thought has ever crossed my mind."

Jack looked over at Sam, "What brings you over here? I thought you and Janet were planning some girls night."

"We were, but then Cassie showed up with a group of her friends. They kind of took over the house."

"So you left Janet at the mercy of a gang of ruthless teenage girls to come and visit an old man and his telescope?"

"Pretty much sums it up."

"Oh well, in that case, beer?"

Sam nodded and Jack reached down beside himself and produced a bottle of beer. He twisted off the cap and handed it to Sam.

"So, was there anything you came here to do Carter?"

"I thought that maybe we could just hang out. You and I never seem to just hang out."

"No..we don't. It's not because I don't enjoy your company, it's because...Oh hell, why don't we ever just hang out?"

"I think we both know why sir."

Jack muttered something under his breath and turned his attention back to the telescope/

"Look sir, maybe coming here was a bad idea. I'll just go home and catch up on some housework."

Sam put her beer down and started to get up but stopped when she felt Jack's hand on her arm.

"Dammit Carter, this is ridiculous! Just because...just because we have this thing between us doesn't we can't be friends and hang out together!"

Sam looked at Jack then shook her head, "I really should leave."

She stood up and straightened her jacket.

"I hate this."

Sam cocked her head, "Hate what sir?"

"This...this awkwardness between us. It never used to be there. I hate the regulations! I hate that I even hug..the woman I love without the fear of a court-martial! I hate that I can't even bring myself to tell her what she means to me."

Sam exhaled slowly, trying to wrap her mind around everything the colonel just said.

"Well, sir...she's here now, so why don't you talk to her?"

Sam sat back down and watched Jack pick at a loose shingle. Putting a hand on his arm, she said softly, "Jack, I'm here now."

Jack made a small noise that could be classed somewhere in between being a sigh and a chuckle.

"After Sara left me, I didn't think I had much hope left in this world. My son was dead, my entire life had effectively been destroyed. When the military wanted me back for a top secret project, things seemed a little brighter. From the moment I first stepped onto Abydos, I dedicated myself to the Stargate program. I was happy when they gave me command of the flag team of the SGC but when they told me that a scientist was going to be on that team...well, you know how I feel about scientists. Then you strolled into the room with your 'don't hate me because my reproductive organs are on the inside' attitude and caught me right off guard. You told me that I'd like you and I did like you Carter, eventually.

You brought hope back into my life. You're the only one who always laughs at my jokes and even though you're way smarter than I am, you don't always roll your eyes whenever I don't understand something. I didn't mean to fall in love with you, it just happened."

Sam felt a blush rising up from her neck onto her cheeks. She knew that she should say something to him, but her mind was completely blank. So they sat in silence, Jack picking at the shingle once again and Sam examining a crease in her leather jacket.

"I lied."

Jack glanced over at Sam, "Lied? About what?"

"I said that I never wondered about what planets out there we've been to. I have thought about it."

"Oh, okay."

Sam lifted her beer up to her lips and took a mouthful. She swallowed it slowly and then set the bottle down again.

"I should leave."

Jack shrugged and turned his telescope a few centimeters to the left.

"Do you see that bright star to the immediate left of Cassiopeia?"

Jack nodded.

"We've been to that system. You almost died in that system."

Jack put his eye to the telescope and Sam stood up.

"Thanks for the beer sir."

Jack continued to gaze at the stars.